Welcome to the Mast and welcome to another fine (Probably) edition of Thursday's Comics! Today, I'm going to things in a slightly different way and change the method with which I review Thursday's Comics.
Before I get started, here's a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside d...joking. I just have a few things to say to however many of you actually read (SINCE NOBODY COMMENTS).
You see, with so much stuff coming out over the next three or four months, I decided to reconsider what issues I wanted to stop buying. For example: One of the comics I bought today was Nova #33. Now, considering that NOTHING is happening in this series that seemingly ties it to the actual Realm of Kings story in any exciting way, I've decided it's one less comic for me to buy and thus, review. If Guardians of the Galaxy #22 ends up being the same way, I will drop that also.
Due to there generally not being enough hours in the day, I don't always get home from the comic store with enough time to read all of the comics I bought AND do the other things I need to do. As you can imagine, this is slightly problematic regarding having to review four, five or sometimes as many as six comics in that same day. Thus, if I buy comics that don't specifically deal with something important or are not part of my regular titles, there's a large chance I'll skip reviewing it.
Don't feel like you've been screwed, readers. The reason for this is so that I can spend more time doing lengthy reviews of the ones that DO matter, rather than having to update you on shit in Nova's comic that I don't even care about. Also, I'm considering not reviewing comics that I buy solely because Deadpool is in them. If they're good issues, fine, but otherwise no. It's a waste of my time and yours.
With that all said, let's get on with the reviews!
Uncanny X-Men #520.
Typical.
Just when I thought this series gave me enough incentive to ditch it...it becomes mildly interesting. There are two sub-plots here:
The first involves Cyclops sending Wolverine, Psylocke and Colossus off to New York City in order to hunt down the remaining Predator X that they didn't manage to kill during the island invasion a few issues ago. Why? Because it was never meant to kill them, apparently. It was meant to collect data and transmit it back to a source. Naturally, Cyke wants to know what or who this is.
When they arrive and Wolverine sniffs his way to it, they find its corpse. Fantomex - French thief and slick assassin alike - is standing over its body and there's tension between him and Wolverine for a bit. Wolverine suggests that they work together, but Fantomex gives him the standard "That's not what I got paid for." schtick, and leaves.
With that, they head to the headquarters of The Fixer and prepare to throwdown with his minions.
I do like that Psylocke is getting a lot more play as a member of the X-Men now. I never saw her as a main team member, but maybe that's just me not reading the X-Books much.
The second of the two sub-plots is the issue involving Utopia and its impending submergence in the ocean, which makes sense. No, really. Because for all the smart people on the island, it's acceptable that they couldn't realise something will sink if enough weight is put on it with nothing to support it...
Magneto, having previously made that deal with Namor, sees the Atlantean king fulfill his promise and erect a pillar to support Utopia with which all of his seamen can dwell within. What?
During a meeting, Magneto finally tells Cyke about his pillar of seamen and Cyke isn't happy. Not because he doesn't appreciate it, but because he feels Magneto isn't following the chain of command. He asks Magneto why he's here and what he wants, to which he is told: "Your trust, Scott.". Cyke rejects this request and Magneto wanders off to the wilderness to talk to himself about how much blood and bad mistakes he has on his hands, and that it's about time he did something good.
I'm gonna come out and say something I don't usually say, because I think it's self-important. I think Matt Fraction, the series' writer, is wrong. I do not agree with what Fraction is doing with Magneto, I don't. He knows more than me and sure, he's a writer for Marvel and everything, but I think his choice of direction is off. Magneto having something up his sleeve would have been expected, even if it made all of this sycophantic posturing irrelevant, but this is a bit much. I understand that he's not the genocidal tyrannical leader he once was, but that doesn't mean we need more tortured villain-now-hero stories.
I'm curious as to what happens next, but considering how much shit is coming out, I may wait a couple months before I grab issues #521 onward.
It feels like they're just stalling for no reason on this book. It's like when you ask someone a question and they stall on answering it so they can Google the question, you know? It's like they have no direction and, every time they're asked a question, they keep telling us to wait. I'm frustrated.
In light of this issue, I won't say that Uncanny X-Men will not yield pleasant results. I'm not gonna say don't pick it up. I'm just going to say that if you already have a lot to get and X-Men titles are not your most favoured, then you may wanna skip out on this.
Realm of Kings: Inhumans #3 of 5.
Realm of Kings is weird.
It started off with a very loud bang, then it had me guessing whether or not it tried to do too many things in too little time without an anchoring main series. Recently, with Realm of Kings: Imperial Guard # 3 of 5, I've felt as though they're getting toward what we saw in the Realm of Kings #1 one-shot. Then all of a sudden, Realm of Kings: Inhumans #3 of 5 comes out and we're back to the political upheaval of the Kree/Inhuman empire again.
It's not that I don't find it interesting, it's that I feel it should be put into a separate title if that's what they want to depict. I'm having trouble seeing how The Fault and the Cancerverse at the end of it are connected to the Kree empire, or how they're having any effect. You know?
Crystal and Ronan continue their endeavour into the bowels of Kree society in hopes of discovering who had set the alpha primatives against them and such, resulting in a number of ambush attempts and Ronan smashing people in their faces with a hammer. All the while, the house of Queen Medusa realise there's a mole somewhere in their midst. It's all pretty solid, but when the other plotline is Queen Medusa and how she isn't comfortable as queen, it really doesn't have enough of a counterpoint to really suck me in.
Realm of Kings: Imperial Guard, for example, focuses both on the mission that The Starjammers and the Imperial Guard have embarked upon into The Fault, as well as Gladiator's role as Shi'ar emperor. Yet, that is done in an intriguing way because it tells the tale of a lifelong, die-hard warrior who is now essentially relegated to sitting on a throne, and how this drains him. I don't feel the two sub-plots in THIS title have a good enough balance, and that's why I think this arc is going to fall a bit short. To his credit, Abnett's dialogue is utterly flawless and the art is beautiful in all of these books, I just feel there needs to be more involving The Fault.
Regardless, Triton and crew head into The Fault further, following the signals of Black Bolt's voice that they picked up on in the previous issue. They finally find their once thought-dead king in the damaged remains of the terrigen bomb delivery vehicle; the place where Black Bolt and Vulcan fought their final battle at the end of War of Kings, only to realise that it's a mirage. These mirages are memories captured by the vehicle's echotech capacitors, which they destroy, leaving them dejected to remain without their leader.
Crystal and Ronan discover the two Kree rebels that had been conspiring against the empire and interrogate them. One of them - Doctor Vere, Kree scientist - hints that the machine next to them could be detonated to great effect, which Crystal then ruins by making it rain and shorting the machine's circuitry, but the machine explodes anyway.
As they check the body of Doctor Vere, his face dissolves and a droid of Kree design is beneath it. They are interrupted by a transmission from the man revealed to be the betrayer, and it's none other than Maximus. Maximus being a very close worker with the queen and her empire, this sews the seeds for the Inhumans to endure more drama during their reign of the Kree empire. Not only do they have to fight back rebellion on a violent level, but also betrayal from within their own ranks.
I don't know how I can sum up this issue in ways I haven't above. It's only five issues and it's defintely interesting, so you couldn't go wrong in picking it up, at least not as wrong as taking a gamble on certain other comics. It's just the weaker of the two mini-series' that support this story.
Deadpool: Merc with a Mouth #7.
With Deadpool: Merc with a Mouth #7, I discovered that the series I once thought I would truly dislike was becoming the book that most encapsulates Deadpool. It is far from my ideal depiction of Deadpool, but so far it's easily the best on-going he has.
Deadpool has left Doctor Betty in the current timeline and jumped into an alternate reality portal in hopes of returning Headpool to his own dimension. Quite naturally, it's never that simple. First they end up in a reality where Deadpool refers to himself as Major Wilson, and is a member of the army for the Unites States of Canada. After Headpool is captured and Deadpool restrained, Major Deadpool begins interrogating him. Eventually, the two get ready to fight after much trash talking. Major ends up de-masking and revealing that he is a chiselled, handsome version of Deadpool, only to be out-witted in combat as Deadpool and Headpool escape into the portal again.
Showing up in another alternate reality, they see Captain America waging war against rebels, accusing them of being traitors. He is seen challenging one rebel in particular, this turns out to be Lady Deadpool, prompting Headpool to comedically observe: "We're hot!". Deadpool intervenes and they fight Captain America together, with little success. Running away to re-group doesn't impress Lady Deadpool, until Deadpool throws Headpool (Too many 'Pools) at Cap, giving him his first taste of flesh in a LONG time.
As Cap is distracted, they both kick him in the head and then, confused, just decide to make out with one another. The resulting, awkward interaction is genuinely relatable to anyone who's had a kiss they should have, but with added comedy. Deadpool then casually says that he's just gonna cut off Cap's arm in an attempt to stop the zombie virus spreading, and then he'll leave. With that, they leap back into the portal.
The next reality they arrive at is a Western style reality whereby Nick Fury (I think) is the sheriff, with Wolverine as some kind of rogue hero. They apprehend Deadpool and say that no longer will The Deadpool Kid be causing trouble. Perturbed and getting a little tired of it all, Deadpool says he just wants to be on his way back, and shoots the arriving version of himself in the head. They agree to let him go and it's back into the portal once more.
Much to their chagrin, they end up back at the feet of Doctor Betty and she's not particularly happy. Deadpool wonders why they're still there, to which Doctor Voodoo appears and says he may be able to answer that.
This concludes the issue.
I have to say I enjoyed this issue. It was a little longer than usual and didn't really leave me with strayed interest. The idea that each timeline had a different artist was particularly nice and a welcome refreshment to what I feel is an overly cartoony aesthetic in the regular series.
My issue with this series is the same issue I have with every depiction of Deadpool that's out, really.
1) Seriously, stop giving Deadpool two voices in his head, Marvel. If you won't let anyone write for him on a regular basis that can produce a regularly GOOD Deadpool, then please stop giving me three mediocre Deadpool dialogues in one comic.
2) WHERE...THE FUCK...ARE THE POP CULTURE REFERENCES?! Breaking the fourth wall and such is what makes Deadpool who he is, it's why a lot of us fell in love with the dude. Take that away and he's not Deadpool anymore. Way does this in the main series, Gischler does it in this one and whoever happens to be writing Deadpool Team-Up manage to leave this aspect out as well. It's pissing me off.
Aside from what I like to call my standard Deadpool gripes, this is the best series we have. The shame is that it's not in continuity, it's not his main series and it never will be. Therefore there'll probably be no incentive to do any serious or dark storylines. This causes extreme concern for me, especially since Deadpool's main series is going to get worse at the hands of Daniel Way, for reasons I'll highlight next week when Deadpool #19 comes out.
Dark Wolverine #82.
This isn't a series I buy regularly, nor will it be. Though, based on this issue - recommended to me by Andrew Salmond Esq. - I can see myself buying it until Siege ends. Obviously, this a Siege tie-in, so you should probably go read Thursday's Comics (7/1/10) to catch up on my main Siege reviews if you haven't so far.
For the uninitiated, Dark Wolverine is the Dark Avengers' version of Wolverine, played by his son, Daken. He has similar powers except that he can secrete pheremones to control people and has two claws; two on top and one underneath his wrist.
As we see Osborn's crew warming up to go lay waste to Asgard, or attempt to at least, Daken is messing with everyone's mind and narrating about how he has everybody where he wants them to be. He has always been the real manipulator of the Dark Avengers, so this doesn't surprise me. After messing with one of H.A.M.M.E.R.'s soldiers in a very homo-erotic way, he beats him into a pulp so that the soldier doesn't have to go fight...for some reason.
While I'm on the subject, homo-eroticism is something that runs throughout this issue and it's a big part of Daken's character (Someone who ranging from crazily captivating to grossly misused. Daken is DEFINITELY the character the divides opinion the most). I think he just does it to fuck with people, because he's done it to Venom (Dark Avengers' version of Spidey) and others, most notably his ex-girlfriend. She accused him of sleeping with a dude in a motel, which he admitted to doing. He didn't, though, he just gutted the guy.
In this issue, I actually think it adds a very interesting overtone, because homosexuality does make a lot of people uncomfortable when it's forced into their faces. This is no more evident than when Daken continually taunts and, dare I say, flirts with Bullseye (Dark Avengers' version of Hawkeye). Naturally, Daken uses Bullseye's anger against him by accusing him of being in denial.
As Daken narrates over the top of their battle in Asgard (Accompanied by some delicious art! Limbs getting sliced, Asgardians getting decapitated, heads getting blown off etc), we see him being watched through some kind of mystical means. It's revealed that the Norns, the Asgardian fates; Skuld, Verdandi and Urd, believe him to be the bringer of the next Ragnarök cycle (Click the link to discover, overall, what that means). Now, I'm not entirely sure why Daken is chosen or what part he has to play...but that's a massive bombshell and more or less answered the question as to whether or not I'll be buying the next issue.
Eventually Osborn and Daken meet on the battlefield and Daken gives his the usual attitude. Osborn asks if they're going to have a problem and turns away, at which point Daken brutally stabs him through the chest from behind (Draw symbolic parallels if you wish). I don't say, "Oh shit...", much when reading comics nowadays, but this was one of those moments (You weren't kidding, Andrew!). How he penetrated Osborn's Iron Patriot armour with bone claws is unknown to me, though.
Osborn is clutching his chest and asks Daken what he's doing, only to receive the reply: "What I was born to do.". Daken places his hand over Osborn's unmasked face and impales it with his underclaw as the Norns look on and comment that what they see is very promising.
Written by Daniel Way (He's good for something now and then, it seems), this issue drops not ONE bombshell, but two. In the very likely event that Daken didn't really kill Osborn (Dream sequence, hallucination etc. Pick your plot vehicle), it doesn't detract from the gravity of the issue, and that's very good. The fact that Way's revealed Daken as this bringer of end times now means a lot for how Siege will unfold.
A surprisingly entertaining issue. The only problem I have is one I'll address after the next review.
Dark Avengers #13.
For a long time lots of fans have disliked The Sentry. Either because he was essentially viewed as a blonde, Superman-esque Thor wannabe or because they just didn't see that he had ANY point, purpose or place in these stories. I fall into the latter camp.
This issue changes EVERYTHING.
It's long been discussed who Osborn's secret weapon is and people had been saying that to reveal it as The Sentry would be a let-down. I agreed, but despite that happening, it's HOW that makes it worth it. All of this issue centres around The Sentry's wife/ex-wife (Not entirely sure) Lindy telling her version of who The Sentry - otherwise known as Robert "Bob" Reynolds - is.
Let's start with what we know/knew about The Sentry.
We all know that The Sentry is this guy who took this serum and became The Sentry. We know that he is mega powerful and at the same time, has massive agorophobia and borderline schizophrenia. He feels that he is possessed or watched by this evil entity known as The Void, which will do something terribly bad for every good thing he does. Norman Osborn tried to convince him that The Void didn't exist, Emma Frost tried helping him to seal it away in his mind, but nobody has ever really known what it is or why it's there.
Part of the synopsis for this issue is: "The Sentry has died twice before. Once during battle and once at the hand of his own long-suffering wife, Lindy. No one knows how he survived both fatal attacks.". Chilling.
The issue opens in or around the year 1600 B.C.E. with a man preaching to a large group. He says that his lord has spoken to him and that every Hebrew house must have its door painted with lamb's blood, so that the vengeance of the lord will pass over the Israelite offspring when wiping out all the first-born sons of Egypt. Eyes glazed over, the man glances at the sky and says: "Then you will know there is only one true God.". As he looks up, the sky is covered with blackness, implied to be The Void.
Time skips forward to two months before the present. There's a flashback to Osborn's original convo with The Sentry when trying to convince him to become one of the members of The Dark Avengers (Not that he knew better). The added dialogue is where we discover Osborn's sinister, and dangerous (Probably more than he is aware) plan. He has continued to manufacture the serum for The Sentry that made him The Sentry, the serum that rejuvenates him, after Tony Stark refused to before. The room fills with explosive light and The Sentry appears refreshed. He thanks Osborn and says he owes him one, to which Osborn says: "Yes, you do. Do you know what that makes you? My secret weapon.".
Osborn and The Sentry's convo is way more weighty when you read the rest of the issue and think back. You truly realise that Osborn has gone off the wagon and is messing with shit he doesn't understand, or does and doesn't care.
Time passes again and it's now three days prior to the present in Avengers Tower, New York City. The Sentry's monitor droid-thing, Cloc, comes into the room and finds Lindy sitting on the floor next to his unmoving body and eroded face, holding a gun. She cries that she has killed him and begins detailing, through narrative to Cloc, why she did this. Requesting that it be recorded as she does so.
It turns out that Bob was a huge drug fiend and only got hold of the serum because he thought it'd be his next big high, he was looking for meth. He wasn't there to become a hero, like Captain America or such.
Naturally, he didn't know just how otherworldly powerful it would make him, not in the least. The Sentry took it by accident, once, and then became heavily addicted and willing to do anything to get more, prompting Lindy to say: "Does this sound like the origin of a golden superhero to you? No? Then what DOES it sound like the origin of?". I'll admit, it's quite a turn. I never expected a backstory such as this.
For a while she was content to just be dating and be married to a superhero, she loved the perks, but she never bothered to ask the real question: "Where did his power actually come from? What did the serum actually DO to him? Did it break his DNA? Did he break through to the next step of man? Was he a god? Was he even human? Was he possessed?".
One night, however, he confessed all of his sins to her in bed. Lindy describes it as the kind of truth a junkie tells, truth that Osborn knows and Stark knew before him. She says this caused her to realise that he was no more than a drug-addicted, mentally ill, murdering monster who blames all his sins on the Bogey Man.
It's revealed that Bob traded addiction to drugs to addiction to power, to being The Sentry. Both of which she says he has little control over, and that The Sentry and The Void are what happens when people who
Here things get quite interesting indeed, way deeper than I actually expected the plot to go and it gives a whole new perspective on The Sentry and what part he will possibly play in Siege. Lindy says she feels his power is biblical in origin, because where did the likes of Moses and Jesus get THEIR ability to do inexplicable things? She asks rhetorically if it's from God, but regardless, what would someone with that power be like today? She worries that men with that kind of power always end up getting sacrificed because their power either destroys them, or gets them destroyed. Finally, Lindy utters that she should have killed him on their wedding night.
A voice from off-panel says that it hurts to hear her say that, and The Sentry arises from the floor, emiting a kind of firey energy and with his eyes glowing. He begins to taunt Lindy and it's clear that The Void is controlling him. After severely belittling her by saying that the only reason she's alive is because Bob loves her and yet, she betrayed him, Lindy asks him to end it quickly and put her out of her misery. Bob's personality kicks in back and forth as he tries to fight it off, eventually electing to fly out of the building and into space. Cloc tells a distraught Lindy: "Now you see how much he loves you.".
As The Sentry bursts through space in a panic, The Void continues to tell him that it's useless to resist and that he's already tried everything to split them apart, but it won't work. Flying himself into the Sun in a last ditch attempt to save his own soul, The Void continues to antagonise him as his skin is regenerating instantly. It reveals to The Sentry that he is god, or at least he tells him he is, and I assume this is a metaphorical thing. Sort of like a "You might as well be God, you're that powerful." kinda thing.
Transporting him back to Earth, he tells The Sentry that all this time, nothing has been accomplished, that there's no point in fighting and that he should just let what needs to be done, be done. The Void says, chillingly:
You want to do something? You want to have an impact? Allow me. I've done it before and something god always came out of it in the long run. Yes, sure, it's a messy thing.".
Then, on the very last page we see a shot similar to the one in at the start with the preacher, the sky above N.Y.C. is covered in blackness. The Void tells The Sentry: "It's God's way.".
I have to admit, this issue is heavy. Not in comparison to everything else, but shit, for an issue of Dark Avengers? I NEVER expected such plot as this. I am SO intrigued as to whether or not it'll lead to something grand. The Sentry went from being a mis-used, purposeless annoyance, to someone pivotal in the entire Marvel universe.
As always, what carries this issue is that Bendis is amazing at dialogue. Coupled with Mike Deodato's robust, strong and evocative art, they make an amazing duo. I always thought Siege would be more than just a hyped event, but now I'm a believer truly.
My issue, as I stated at the end of the prior review, is how they're going to inter-weave a lot of seemingly important character plots. The Sentry is going biblical, Daken is going all Norse fates and lest we forget that Loki had somehow empowered The Hood with Asgardian magic of some sort. For what purpose? We don't know. I just hope we get resolution to all of these plots without it being crowbarred or ham-fisted, but that remains to be seen.
I seriously cannot give a higher recommendation of this stuff to you guys. I don't know how many of you read this, but if you can get a hold of these issues, do so.
To quote Martin Lawrence: "Shit just got real.".
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Another week, another edition of Thursday's Comics all wrapped up! Thanks for reading, thanks for being interesting and thanks for supporting me as always.
The huge announcement I originally hinted to is kind of hanging in the balance at the moment, so I'm not entirely sure if it's gonna happen or not, but I'll announce the resurrection or death of this possibility when either happens.
Additionally, I have a VERY...VERY...EXTREMELY special edition of The Mast Looks Back coming around the beginning or middle of April, depending on eBay delivery times. It's a comic, that much is obvious and you will KNOW is madly important to me when you see it, but which one? You'll never believe it.
Stay tuned, true believers.
Until next time, peace!
-The Mast
